PMs Guide to Selection & Matching

Matching

How you will match your programme participants is a key element in the overall programme design and needs to be clearly defined and agreed upfront. It is often the one thing that people will ask most questions about and have the greatest expectations from in your programme and the more transparent you can be about how the process will work, the greater commitment you will get from participants.

It is not an exact science and the larger the number of your programme participants the more complex it can become. Great programme coordinators would say that the personal touch adds great value – having some prior knowledge of participants can help. However, clearly this is less of an option on large scale programmes. There are various online solutions for this process which may be considered but the more automated you make this process the more impact it is likely to have on matching success.

Matching Process

There are a number of areas to consider as you approach designing your matching

Choice of mentor – will you allow your mentees any element of choice in their mentor? In programmes with limited mentor numbers you may not be able to offer a choice. A recommended option is guided choice — where a programme manager may suggest 2-3 identified mentors and then let the mentee have the final say. Beware of releasing mentor names as part of any selection process as mentees will often be motivated to choose people for the wrong reason (i.e. for sponsorship). An open choice can be great, and might be the best way if you have large numbers and are able to have a database of profiles that prospective mentees can access and make a select from.

Matching before or after training – will you match people before or after any training/briefing? Again with low numbers it may be easier to match prior to any training. However, if you don’t know participants well, the opportunity to meet them during the session and get a feel for their personalities can be very useful as you match people. Also, as training often makes people review their original understanding and expectations of the programme, they might like the opportunity to reflect on their original application and amend that in light of what they’ve learnt.

Matching criteria – what will be the criteria you use to match people and how will you collect this information?

The first criterion should always be that the mentor is off-line (i.e. out of the mentee’s direct reporting line).

The other criteria will be dependent on the type of programme you are creating and the purpose of that programme. Some potential options are:

• Mentee learning needs/goals vs mentor experience
• Gender – good to consider for diversity focused programmes
• Geography – often this element can take priority as enabling participants to meet face to face is always an advantage, clearly this will be less relevant if your relationships are global and will be conducted virtually
• Ethnicity – can be relevant in diversity focused programmes
• Experience gap – the gap between mentor and mentee in grade and experience should be sufficient for learning to occur – as a guide normally a gap of up to two grades works well. If the gap is too great the mentor simply may not remember what it is like to be at that level in the organisation and so cannot help the mentee in the way that he or she needs.
• Technical skill/specialism – be careful around matching on specialist skills unless that is a key purpose of your programme. When people’s areas of experience are well known the potential for learning is reduced.
• Tenure in job role and company (mentor) – good for graduate programmes as knowledge of how the organisation works will be key

The more criteria you try and match with, the more difficult your task is likely to be as it will be virtually impossible to find a perfect match. Beware of gathering too much information from participants as this will also raise their expectations around matching. Generally focusing on 2 or 3 main criteria will simplify the process. Then to use your knowledge of participants to think through the potential for rapport building. Remember as you define the matching process that you will need to explain your criteria and matching reason to participants.

Matching communication suggestions

• Will you explain the criteria you used to match people? I would suggest this is a good idea as transparency supports people’s acceptance of their match and can highlight issues around mentor pool size, geography, stretch for learning.
• Will you explain a “no-fault break clause”? We would recommend at some point letting people know that on some rare occasions matches don’t work. If after a couple of meetings they don’t feel the relationship will work, it’s better to accept this fact and potentially try again. If there is a limited pool of mentors in the programme then re-matching may not be possible and of course then it may be better to play down this feature and just suggest that if people have any issues after a few meetings to get in touch with the programme manager
• In your communication to advise of the matching result you can position the match as a recommended option and highlight the benefits of each individual match, whilst emphasising that this is the best match for them from the current pool of mentors, based on their needs. The more mentees feel that they have had a choice, however limited, in the process the more buy in you have from them into the relationship.
• Do you want participants to contact each other immediately or hold off until after any workshop? If you’re advising of matches prior to any workshops then you may need to manage this, as people will start contacting each other and you might like to provide them with some support around this prior to any training
• Who should take the initiative to organise the meeting – it’s often good to give a steer on this so that either Mentor or Mentee makes the first move

Matching tips

• Think about how much stretch you’d like in relationships –a model of the more dissimilar someone is personally and professionally to you the more learning there is in the relationship. Equally the more known someone is to you in both areas the less challenge and stretch there will be. This is something it is important to highlight to participants so that they fully understood the potential of their relationships
• Use your knowledge of individuals to influence matching decisions – it is good to know that people will be able to build rapport together
• A great mentor will clearly express their understanding that this is a two way learning experience and that they are also keen to learn – beware of people who only say they would like to give something back, they will need training and support to develop their mentoring skills and may be better matched with a mentee who is more self-aware
• Mentees who are looking for any type of sponsorship or particularly want someone very senior will often need managing quite closely and will need to be matched with a more experienced mentor, who can manage their expectations
• What will you do with mentors that you don’t feel have the appropriate skills?. Often programme managers avoid dealing with this and simply advise such cases that there wasn’t a suitable match. While giving honest critical feedback to a senior manager can be difficult, the programme manager should model the authentic behaviours you expect from your mentors and explain why you feel they are not yet ready to be a mentor. In the vast majority of cases, people know this instinctively already and are open to becoming mentees to more experienced mentors.
• It is worth noting that in relation to personality, research has shown that a pairing is less likely to succeed if you mix extraverts with introverts, but other dimensions of personality have relatively little impact on the quality of pairings. Some organizations, such as Statoil in Norway, use motivational profiling as one of the inputs into their matching procedures. This appears to filter out gross mismatches in personal values.

Matching mentors and mentees

Summary from Egan, G The Skilled Helper

Claiborn (1982): a difference in point of view in the learning conversation achieves positive change by addressing the way the client “construes problems and considers solutions”.

Trevino (1996) referring to cross-cultural counselling: “Certain patterns of congruency and discrepancy … between client and counsellor facilitate change.” Congruency enhances the relationship; discrepancy facilitates change.

Martin (1994) The client sees the dialogue as added most value when it is helpful, interested and relevant, as well as “somehow inconsistent (discordant) with their current theories of themselves and their circumstances”.

GUIDELINES FOR MENTEES IN INTERVIEWING PROSPECTIVE MENTORS

Interviewing someone more senior can be a very daunting prospect, especially when you both know that you may select someone else! What should you tell them about you? What should you ask them about themselves? How will you evaluate them? How will you tell those, who you don’t choose? These are all realistic questions to consider before you arrange to meet with the first of your potential mentors.

Preparation

Before arranging the first meeting, you should have a relatively clear idea of what sort of person will be most helpful for you. Are your looking for someone who will have, for example:

• The ability to stretch and challenge your thinking?
• Wide networks (or very specific networks) relevant to your current work or future career?
• A high level of empathy with your position?
• A high level of technical knowledge in your job area?
• Other specific experience you would like to tap into?
• A completely different perspective on the issues that concern you?
• A good understanding of career opportunities in the company?
• Substantial experience in assisting behavioural change?
• Substantial experience in helping people make big jumps in performance/ personal effectiveness?

It’s also useful, especially in a mentoring programme aimed at supporting diversity objectives, to consider how important it is to you to have someone of:

• Similar age or much older
• Same or different gender
• Same or different race or culture

Remember – same gender/ same race matches typically tend to provide more empathy and support, while diverse matches typically provide greater learning and more effective networking.

Finally, consider:

• What learning do I want from this relationship?
• What sort of person will I learn most from?
• What sort of person will I find it easiest to work with?
• What experience would your ideal mentor have, that you could tap into?
• What aspects of you and your experience might they find interesting and useful?
• What could you offer them in the way of learning or constructive challenge?

You may wish to draw up a scorecard of the key characteristics you are looking for and assign each a five point scale.

If possible, send the mentor some background about you and what you are looking for, ahead of the meeting. (You might include your scorecard, too!)

At the meeting

The key thing to remember is that this is an exchange. You are both making a choice here – the mentor can decide s/he doesn’t want to work with you, too!

Key topics for your agenda should include:

• Who are we?
• What change do you want to see in you and in your circumstances in the next 12 months?
• What experiences of mentoring have you both had before?
• Why were you attracted to mentoring, as opposed to other forms of development?
• What do you feel passionately about in your work/ non-work areas of your life?
• What do you both hope to learn from the relationship?
• How would you work together?
• What level of commitment is each of you prepared to make to the relationship?
• What support does the mentee need/ is the mentor prepared to offer?

It can be very helpful to summarise what you have both learned at the end of the meeting. Be sure to say that you have found the meeting useful and enjoyable, if that is the case.

It often happens that the mentor begins the mentoring process then and there, helping you think through one or more issues. If so, this is a good opportunity to observe and subsequently reflect upon their mentoring style and how well you think that would suit your needs.

After the meeting

This is the point, where you complete your scorecard. Respect your intuition, but challenge it, too. If you found the initial meeting a little uncomfortable, was that because you didn’t like the mentor’s attitude or because s/he made you think?

• Some other questions to ask yourself include:
• Was I able to relax with this person?
• Did s/he ask me insightful questions?
• Did I or they do most of the talking?
• How willing are they to share their experience with me?
• Did I feel they would enjoy/ benefit from the relationship, too?
• Will we be able to get into sufficient depth in our discussions?
• Will they be able to make the commitment of time and mental energy?
• Do we have similar values about things that matter?
• Can I see myself still benefiting from meeting with this person in six month’s time?

Telling the mentor(s) you didn’t choose

This may take courage, but it is a good preparation for the openness and honesty that characterise an effective mentoring relationship. You owe it to them to let them know that you have chosen someone else and why. It’s only an insult, if you are not honest with them. Many mentees find that they are still able to build very good relationships with prospective mentors they turn down, because the mentors respect them for the quality and usefulness of their feedback.

Experience suggests that it’s a lot easier and more effective to hold this conversation face to face. You can be more open and there is less room for misunderstanding than with e-mails.

Some basic guidelines are:

• Be positive – “I really valued your input/ what I saw as the strong benefits of a mentoring relationship with you”
• Be specific – “I chose X for these reasons…” and, if appropriate, “Where I felt you didn’t meet my criteria sufficiently, was…”
• Show respect – “I appreciated your time.”
• Maintain the relationship – “I’d like to be able to use you as an informal advisor from time to time, if you are willing.”

The mentor you do select is likely to be motivated not only by the fact that you specifically chose him or her, for clearly defined reasons, but in the knowledge that you are willing and able to tackle difficult conversations. It will encourage the mentor to stretch you just that bit further than might otherwise have been the case.

And if you chose wrongly…

Remember that every mentor and mentee are expected to review their relationship after two meetings, to ensure that the match is right in practice. If it’s not, then you have the opportunity to change mentor.

GUIDELINES FOR MENTORS IN BEING INTERVIEWED BY PROSPECTIVE MENTEES

Selecting a suitable mentor is a difficult task for the mentee, but mentors can make it a lot easier by:

• Being available to talk with them at an early date (the longer you make them wait, the more anxious they may be)
• Recognising that they may have concerns about interviewing and possibly turning down someone more senior and re-assuring them
• Being clear about your own motives for being a mentor and explaining these
• Being clear about what you can and can’t offer as a mentor
• Based on the mentee’s blog (which you should have already read) discussing where your experience is and isn’t relevant
• Being prepared to offer some impromptu mentoring as part of the interview
• Talking about your own expectations from a mentee

It’s also useful, especially in a mentoring programme aimed at supporting diversity objectives, to consider how important it is to you to have someone of:

• Similar age or much younger
• Same or different gender
• Same or different race or culture

Remember – same gender/ same race matches typically tend to provide more empathy and support, while diverse matches typically provide greater learning and more effective networking.

Finally, consider:

What learning do I want from this relationship?

What sort of mentee will I find it most interesting and beneficial to work with?

What aspects of you and your experience might they find most interesting and useful?

Is this a relationship that will have sufficient constructive challenge for both of you?

You may wish to draw up a scorecard of the key characteristics you are looking for and assign each a five point scale.

If possible, ask the mentee to send you some background about they you are looking for, ahead of the meeting. (You might include your scorecard, too!)

If you already know the mentee, or have heard reports about them from their line manager, try not to place too much emphasis on second-hand knowledge. Be prepared to use the relationship as an opportunity to get to know the real person.

At the meeting

The key thing to remember is that this is an exchange. You are both making a choice here – the mentor can decide s/he doesn’t want to work with you, too!

Key topics for your agenda should include:

• Who are we?
• What change does the mentee himself/ herself and in their circumstances in the next 12 months?
• What experiences of mentoring have you both had before?
• Why were they attracted to mentoring, as opposed to other forms of development?
• What do both of you feel passionately about in your work/ non-work areas of your life?
• What do you both hope to learn from the relationship?
• How would you work together?
• What level of commitment is each of you prepared to make to the relationship?
• What support does the mentee need/ are you prepared to offer?

It can be very helpful to summarise what you have both learned at the end of the meeting. Be sure to say that you have found the meeting useful and enjoyable, if that is the case.

It you use a mentoring approach during the meeting, to help the mentee think through one or more issues, this is a good opportunity to observe and subsequently reflect upon how they react to your mentoring style.

After the meeting

This is the point, where you complete your scorecard. Respect your intuition, but challenge it, too. If you found the initial meeting a little uncomfortable, was that because you didn’t like the mentee’s attitude or because s/he challenged / stretched you?

Some other questions to ask yourself include:

• Was I able to relax with this person?
• Did s/he ask me insightful questions?
• Did I or they do most of the talking?
• How willing are they to be open with me?
• Did I feel they would enjoy/ benefit from the relationship, too?
• Will we be able to get into sufficient depth in our discussions?
• Will they be able to make the commitment of time and mental energy?
• Do we have similar values about things that matter?
• Can I see this person benefiting from mentoring with me in six month’s time?

When the choice is made

If the mentee decides to go with you, spend some time at your first formal meeting exploring what qualities they thought made you the first choice and re-clarify the objectives of the relationship. These may change with greater openness. Make sure you carry out the two meeting review, to check that the relationship really is what they need.

If they decide to go with someone else:

Don’t feel rejected. People’s needs are very individual. As the mentee’s needs change, they may well return to you in the future.

If you are prepared to offer ad hoc informal mentoring, ensure they understand this is the case.

Use the subsequent conversation with them as an opportunity for constructive feedback. To help them overcome any natural caution about criticising someone more senior, use questions such as: what’s the one thing you’d advise me if you were my mentor?

Experience suggests that it’s a lot easier and more effective to hold this conversation face to face. You can be more open and there is less room for misunderstanding than with e-mails.

Matching external coaches with internal clients

The effectiveness of a coaching assignment depends on a number of factors, amongst which the following are particularly important:

• The client’s willingness to be coached
• The credibility of the coach from the client’s perspective
• The overall experience and capability of the coach in coaching
• How well the coach’s experience enables them to empathise with and explore the client’s issues.

Typically, clients select a coach on the basis of a “chemistry meeting” – an introductory, uncharged session to assess how well they will be able to work together. They may just interview one coach, or several. However, before this, they will need recommendations from HR of suitable coaches to approach.

HR needs to explore with the client:

• What is the primary purpose of the coaching? (Is it for skills transfer, performance improvement, behaviour change, or broader leadership development?) You should have a clear understanding of which of these types of coaching the coach has most experience in.
• How important is it that the coach has experience in the client’s business area? At the same level of leadership?
• Does the client have issues that may require a coach with substantial expertise in counselling or therapy?
• Are there personality types they find it particularly hard to work with? (For example, highly introvert clients sometimes find it difficult to build rapport with highly extrovert coaches and vice versa.)
• What other characteristics will make the coach credible in the client’s eyes?

It is also advisable to seek some input on these issues from the client’s line manager.

Brief the coachee on how to assess the coaches they interview. Useful questions here are:

• Do you feel that you can open up and be honest with this coach?
• Can you learn from this coach?
• Will this coach provide sufficient challenge?
• Do you feel that they have an appropriate background to understand the general nature of the issues and challenges you face?
• Do you feel confident in their coaching ability?
• Did you come away from the chemistry meeting with some initial, useful insights?
• What can this coach offer you uniquely, that you value?

If possible, take the time to help the coachee review and compare the coaches they have interviewed, while bearing in mind that the choice has to be theirs.

FAQs

• Should HR sit in on the chemistry meeting? Only if the client requests it and only for the purpose of helping debrief the client on their impressions.
• What if the client doesn’t like any of the coaches they interview? Revisit their original requirements.
• What if the client doesn’t get on with the coach, once the assignment has started? Be prepared to rematch, but explore first with the client what lies behind this change of heart, as you may need to apply different matching criteria.

© David Clutterbuck, 2015

Prof David Clutterbuck
Coaching and Mentoring International Ltd
Woodlands, Tollgate,
Maidenhead,
Berks, UK. SL6 4LJ

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