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Whether it be a computer cable, a garden hose or a shoelace, we all have experienced how hard a is to untangle a tangle. Jiggle the wrong way, or too hard, or too soft and we make it worse. Scientists at the Georgia Institute of Technology have been experimenting with a robot to find the “sweet spot” that loosens a tight knot. Low frequency (a few times per second) moves the knot without affecting the thread and high frequency (more than 37 shakes a second) tightens the knot further. The sweet spot lies at around 17 shakes per second.
What’s the relevance to coaching? Clients’ issues are often like a tangle – it’s hard to know which thread to pull or how hard. When a coach thinks he or she can see the problem, there’s a real danger that pulling on that thread will tighten up other parts of the knot. The skill is to experiment with multiple threads, testing each to find the right frequency to start the process of unravelling.
An admonition I often give to coaches is “the moment you think you understand in the moment to shut up and really listen”. Then you are more likely to see connections between threads, you can identify where jiggling gently on several at the same time might achieve a sudden release of insight.
Anecdotally, we know that over-enthusiastic coaching can make things worse for a client. Perhaps the metaphor of the tangled string might help us become better at finding the sweet spot in how we question and challenge our clients.
©️David Clutterbuck, 2024
